So I am house-sitting for the folks I live with. Wait…that didn't make sense. What I'm trying to say is I'm taking care of the house where I live while the hosts enjoy their mission trip to China.
There are three animals in the house: Abbey, the half-mutt, half-lab dog (well, I guess there's no such thing as a half mutt, but oh well…); Callie, a fluffy white cat that suffers from a severe case of misanthropy; and Smokey, a cute little grey kitty that always jumps on the table when I'm having breakfast and starts purring at very sight of my hand approaching her face.
Now, as much as I enjoy animals, I must confess I don't always understand them very well. Take Callie, for example: I think she is the living proof that felines can also suffer from bipolar disorder. Sometimes she comes to me, rubbing herself fiercely against my legs and begging to be petted (or fed, it's hard to tell). My usual response used to be to acquiesce to her advances and pet her…but then suddenly, for no reason, she would get those sharp claws out and scratch me repeatedly at the speed of light (think of a skilled cook chopping onions) or, even worse, clutch my hand with her two paws and bite me! Then she would utter this creepy, guttural growl, lower her ears, and dart away under the couch. I must confess that after enduring this abusive scenario a few times, I became distrusting of Callie and now we are barely on speaking terms. I'm thinking about feeding Zoloft to her and see what happens.
Now Smokey is an entirely different beast. She is definitely touchy-feely and actually only attacks me when I don’t pet her long enough (typical female behavior, I suppose). We actually had quite a poignant moment yesterday when I got home from work and began cleaning her room (yes, she has a room, don't ask). I was going about my business scooping the litter box when I noticed her staring at it intently (almost anxiously), even clawing the marble (or is it granite?) floor. As soon as I got done she leaped into the litter box, started digging around and then she stood still, arched her back in a convex shape and dropped her load right there, in my presence (and Abbey's), with a grin on her face. It was like watching ice-cream come out of the machine, spiral-shaped and everything. Three good chunks of butter pecan goodness. Then she sniffed it a bit as if to verify that the "delivery" was accomplished, and finally proceeded to dig furiously until the droppings were completely covered. I was jaw-dropped. This may not mean much to you, but to me that was a milestone…I had NEVER seen a cat have a BM! I had always thought they were private animals, but clearly this one is pretty comfortable with me. I was embarrassed at the tears that started rolling down my eyes (though I still didn't let her sit on my lap that night and wonder if I ever will again).
Not much to say about Abbey. She's your typical ADHD dog who's starting to go grey on the whiskers a bit too early (she's only three, I think). I've never seen her have a BM either…which is good. I have, nonetheless, seen her snack out of the cats’ litter box. That was gross.
Animals…gotta love them.
Sunday, May 13, 2007
Friday, May 11, 2007
The difference between forgiveness and Forgiveness
Forgiveness is a notion that most of us are aware of and familiar with, but sometimes I get the feeling that folks don't realize the full meaning of the word. Oftentimes they allow their own rationalizations to get in the way of extracting the joy that comes from true forgiveness.
For instance, I read the other day someone saying that "a righteous person should forgive privately because to forgive others' sins is God's business, not ours". The person went on to say that announcing to someone that you have forgiven him/her is downright sinful, because it is self-serving and turns a blind eye to wickedness.
I disagree with the statement above wholeheartedly. Forgiveness may be God's business, but those of us who fear Him are the carriers of His business here on Earth. Furthermore, drawing from my Christian worldview, I believe that forgiveness is a two-way street, where one person offers forgiveness and the other receives it; if either one of the parts is missing, true forgiveness is not achieved. Man does not receive God's forgiveness and the gift of salvation unless he asks for and takes hold of it. Salvation is available to all, but only enjoyed by those who embrace it. Analogously, your offender will only take hold of your forgiveness if it is somehow communicated to him or her. How would I know to ask God for forgiveness of my sins had He not communicated to me that I was a sinner in the first place and that He was willing to forgive me? At the same time, God doesn't simply say "turn or burn"; rather, He continually demonstrates His unconditional love towards us (with its epiphany in Jesus' death and resurrection on the cross) to elicit our need for repentance. In short, He gives us a reason to desire forgiveness.
This is where the analogy ends. God is sovereign, perfect, and (most relevant to this discussion) just. In His perfect and sovereign justice, He will ultimately judge and condemn those who refuse to accept His means for reconciliation. Damnation is exactly this: God finally granting one's desire to be eternally separated from Him, despite His beckoning throughout one's life. Make no mistake: to be damned is a bad thing; the Bible makes this very clear (Matt.13:42; Rev. 21:8). For those who like fantasy and allegory, C.S. Lewis’ The Great Divorce paints a haunting picture of what eternal separation from God might be like from our infinitely limited human perspective.
But I digress. Most likely, you will not have to tell your offender that you were wronged against. But there's still the part where you do need to demonstrate that you are willing to forgive, so that your offender will be prompted to reconcile the relationship and thus accomplish the forgiveness process. It is a beautiful and restoring experience that will not be enjoyed if you just forgive your offender "silently" (if such a thing is possible at all). Furthermore, forgiveness will only turn a blind eye to wickedness if your offender is not really regretful, and this only ratifies my view that forgiveness is indeed a two-way street. You cannot shake hands with a person that has no hands; in the same way, you cannot forgive a person who is not willing to receive forgiveness.
To be clear, I absolutely emphasize that we ought to have a forgiving attitude at all times, as instructed by Jesus himself:
Then Peter came to Him and said, Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? Up to seven times? Jesus said to him, I do not say to you, up to seven times, but up to seventy times seven. Therefore the kingdom of heaven is like a certain king who wanted to settle accounts with his servants. (Matthew 18:21-23)
Note: Obviously, the seventy times seven is not to be taken literally, but as an indication that one should always forgive.
For the sake of semantic clarity, let me attempt to differentiate prosaic forgiveness from full-blown Forgiveness (note the uppercase in this latter instance of the word). In this scenario, Forgiveness can be understood as a natural law or perhaps a logical proposition. It can possibly be better described by a formula:
Forgiveness = "outgoing forgiveness" (to give up resentment of or claim to requital for) + "incoming forgiveness" (to be made aware that resentment was relinquished and repent).
Our job as victims of the offense is to dispense outgoing forgiveness and hope and pray for our offender to receive incoming forgiveness in order for Forgiveness to be achieved.
Looking back at the statement that prompted me to write this little essay, I cannot help but think that "silent forgiveness" is indeed what is sinful, self-serving, and actually quite convenient. It is loveless and has no sacrificial quality.
In conclusion, I challenge you to think about your own convictions about Forgiveness and strive not to deprive yourself from letting it run its full course, either as an offender or the victim of the offense.
For instance, I read the other day someone saying that "a righteous person should forgive privately because to forgive others' sins is God's business, not ours". The person went on to say that announcing to someone that you have forgiven him/her is downright sinful, because it is self-serving and turns a blind eye to wickedness.
I disagree with the statement above wholeheartedly. Forgiveness may be God's business, but those of us who fear Him are the carriers of His business here on Earth. Furthermore, drawing from my Christian worldview, I believe that forgiveness is a two-way street, where one person offers forgiveness and the other receives it; if either one of the parts is missing, true forgiveness is not achieved. Man does not receive God's forgiveness and the gift of salvation unless he asks for and takes hold of it. Salvation is available to all, but only enjoyed by those who embrace it. Analogously, your offender will only take hold of your forgiveness if it is somehow communicated to him or her. How would I know to ask God for forgiveness of my sins had He not communicated to me that I was a sinner in the first place and that He was willing to forgive me? At the same time, God doesn't simply say "turn or burn"; rather, He continually demonstrates His unconditional love towards us (with its epiphany in Jesus' death and resurrection on the cross) to elicit our need for repentance. In short, He gives us a reason to desire forgiveness.
This is where the analogy ends. God is sovereign, perfect, and (most relevant to this discussion) just. In His perfect and sovereign justice, He will ultimately judge and condemn those who refuse to accept His means for reconciliation. Damnation is exactly this: God finally granting one's desire to be eternally separated from Him, despite His beckoning throughout one's life. Make no mistake: to be damned is a bad thing; the Bible makes this very clear (Matt.13:42; Rev. 21:8). For those who like fantasy and allegory, C.S. Lewis’ The Great Divorce paints a haunting picture of what eternal separation from God might be like from our infinitely limited human perspective.
But I digress. Most likely, you will not have to tell your offender that you were wronged against. But there's still the part where you do need to demonstrate that you are willing to forgive, so that your offender will be prompted to reconcile the relationship and thus accomplish the forgiveness process. It is a beautiful and restoring experience that will not be enjoyed if you just forgive your offender "silently" (if such a thing is possible at all). Furthermore, forgiveness will only turn a blind eye to wickedness if your offender is not really regretful, and this only ratifies my view that forgiveness is indeed a two-way street. You cannot shake hands with a person that has no hands; in the same way, you cannot forgive a person who is not willing to receive forgiveness.
To be clear, I absolutely emphasize that we ought to have a forgiving attitude at all times, as instructed by Jesus himself:
Then Peter came to Him and said, Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? Up to seven times? Jesus said to him, I do not say to you, up to seven times, but up to seventy times seven. Therefore the kingdom of heaven is like a certain king who wanted to settle accounts with his servants. (Matthew 18:21-23)
Note: Obviously, the seventy times seven is not to be taken literally, but as an indication that one should always forgive.
For the sake of semantic clarity, let me attempt to differentiate prosaic forgiveness from full-blown Forgiveness (note the uppercase in this latter instance of the word). In this scenario, Forgiveness can be understood as a natural law or perhaps a logical proposition. It can possibly be better described by a formula:
Forgiveness = "outgoing forgiveness" (to give up resentment of or claim to requital for) + "incoming forgiveness" (to be made aware that resentment was relinquished and repent).
Our job as victims of the offense is to dispense outgoing forgiveness and hope and pray for our offender to receive incoming forgiveness in order for Forgiveness to be achieved.
Looking back at the statement that prompted me to write this little essay, I cannot help but think that "silent forgiveness" is indeed what is sinful, self-serving, and actually quite convenient. It is loveless and has no sacrificial quality.
In conclusion, I challenge you to think about your own convictions about Forgiveness and strive not to deprive yourself from letting it run its full course, either as an offender or the victim of the offense.
The Eagle Has Landed
OK, I decided to create my very own blog. You may call it cheating, but I have some ramblings that I wrote in the recent past that I might be posting here, inasmuch as they are still relevant (in my humble opinion).
You are welcome to hit me hard with your comments...I hope I won't regret saying that!
Thanks for reading...
...and these are my 2 cents.
You are welcome to hit me hard with your comments...I hope I won't regret saying that!
Thanks for reading...
...and these are my 2 cents.
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